No Santa Rally for Naughty Trader

Local trader Brad McAllister was left disappointed on Christmas morning when his wish for a Santa Rally went unfulfilled. “I’ve been mostly good this year,” McAllister complained, sipping a pumpkin-spiced Red Bull at his desk. “Sure, maybe I manipulated a meme stock or two, but I deserve a rally!”

McAllister learned the hard way this Christmas that Santa takes his Naughty List very seriously. Insiders report that Santa declined McAllister's request after reviewing his "behavioral portfolio." “He leveraged his Christmas spirit to buy call options on coal futures,” one elf revealed under the condition of anonymity.

As McAllister closed out another losing trade, he was heard to mutter, “Forget this guy. Next year it’s a Krampus Rally.”